Tuesday, August 18, 2009

War of The Gods: ARES

Not too long ago, a friend and I were discussing our mutual love of mythology, specifically, comics mythology.

More so how Marvel is in love with Norse mythology and DC, Greek. I'd known this friend had been away from comics for a good while but when we got to the subject of Marvel's recent use of the Greek pantheon, he almost bust a gut:

"But Marvel doesn't DO the Greek pantheon, it's like... a line, man. You just don't cross it! Marvel does the Norse gods, DC does the Greek gods! It's always been that way. You just don't do it, Marvel. You just don't."

This was said with the conviction of a man wholeheartedly against race-mixing.

Well, they did and to be honest, I think they're doing a pretty good job of it.

So, with that said, in the ongoing debate of "Who's better? DC or Marvel," we're going to play War of The Gods, Second Printing-style.

First up?

MARVEL
ItalicARES, GOD OF WAR

Wouldja look at this guy? This is Marvel's God of War. You know what this guy says?

He says, "Welcome! Welcome to Ren-Fair, one and all," and then you punch him in the nuts and walk in for free.

Knowing that I would punch this guy so hard in the nuts, Marvel went and did something about it, making him over into:

THE GUY ON THE LEFT.

Now, that guy has War God written all over him: skull-n-bones, armor, gun, 90's pouches for... stuff, sword, big ass ax and studded kneepads for when you really need to knee a guy in the junk and send a message.

Plus, this guy is a Dark Avenger. He's on the team in case Sentry, the most powerful man in the Marvel Universe, ever goes off the mental radar. He's there to take him down.

Plus, this one time, he set himself on fire and had his brother, Hercules, throw him at stuff.

Style points.

DC COMICS
ARES, GOD OF WAR

Now, that is how you make a damned first impression! "**** 'em all, let us sort 'em out!"

That is how gods should sound. Speaking in third person, using terms like, "weak-kneed mortals!" "DOGS OF WAR!" "LUNACY!"

"FORCE IS ALL MEN UNDERSTAND! FORCE IS ALL THEY WORSHIP! AND I AM FORCE INCARNATE!"

Put Black Sabbath's "War Pigs," behind it and it only gets better!

DC's God of War has always been a bit of a bad boy, proclaiming war on something or someone, usually getting his ass handed to him by love or a cute bunny but dammit, he never lets that stop him.

He gets back on that that war horse and tries, tries, tries again.

And when that doesn't work, he embraces the computer, proclaims himself the god of conflict and overthrew Olympus, eventually overthrowing Hell.

Style points.

Ares was last seen in Wonder Woman, getting his head caved in with his own axe.

Negative style points.

With that, Marvel's Ares only recently got kinda cool while DC's has always been a total bad-ass.

The coolest George Perez costume design, ever.

Doubt me?
This is what swagger looks like.

ADVANTAGE: DC'S GOD OF WAR

1 comment:

Nate said...

It all comes down to Heroclix:

Who's riding into battle next to my Chariot of Thor?

DC ARES!